Underneath Suburban Stars

I got scammed...

2009-07-24T14:36:00.002-05:00

This is very brief because I wrote it for twitter but it was way too long.

I was scammed, but got my money back. I was trying to sell a guitar on Craigslist. A "buyer" said he would send me a money order and pick it up when he was in town. He said his agent made a mistake and sent me money for the wrong item, and that he sent me to mucha nd asked me if he could trust me to wire him the extra money back. I got the check for $1800. I waited for the bank to clear it and they did. I did what I thought the honest thing was and took my $270 and wired him the money via Western Union like he asked. However, I was so busy yesterday, I never sent the guy the transfer number or any information on where to pick it up. The bank calls the next day to say the check was fraud and that I owe them 1800 dollars. Yeah... so long story short...I run all over the place and make tons of calls. I was able to get a hold of WU and since I never gave the guy the transfer number, he was unable to pick it up. I canceled the transaction, and after a long time of communication and transfering, the money was wired back to me, and I was given every cent I had given to UW, including the $100 in transfer fees.

Amen

I'm going on tour tomorrow

2009-06-10T19:03:00.002-05:00

If you didn't know already, I'm going on tour tomorrow for a month. This is my schedule:

June 10th- Tulsa, OK- Shades of Brown

June 11th- Dallas, TX- White Rock Coffee

June 12th- Denton, TX- Banter

June 13th- Houston, TX- Ecclesia

June 15th- Bryan, TX- The Stafford

June 16th- Austin, TX- Headhunters

June 18th- McPherson, KS- The Hearth Room

June 19th- Hutchinson, KS- Metropolitan Coffee

June 20th- Columbia, MO- Cherry St. Artisan

June 24th- Lafayette, IN- Skylight Coffee House

June 25th- Royal Oak, MI- Caribou Coffee

June 28th- Orchard Park, NY- Life Church

June 30th- Orchard Park, NY- House Show

July 1st- East Aurora, NY- Taste

July 2nd- Bridgeport, CT- Two Boots

July 3rd- Brooklyn, NY- Roots Cafe

July 6th- Philadelphia, PA- The Blockley Pub

July 8th- Buies Creek, NC- Grace Community Church

For more details, see: www.myspace.com/spencersharpe

2009-05-16T20:23:00.001-05:00

It's interesting that the drinking culture is more supportive of local music than the church culture.

Your thoughts?

2009-05-10T19:36:00.004-05:00

Death Cab, Cold War Kids, Ra Ra Riot

2009-04-15T12:20:00.002-05:00

Matt came up with the brilliant idea of me talking about the Death Cab For Cutie, Cold War Kids, and Ra Ra Riot show on Sunday. I wish I would have set up mobile blogging before it so that way I could have given the same mobile updates that I sent to my Twitter.

I liked the show, overall. I am a big DCFC fan, and I will at least like anything they put out.

First things first:

I went with my sister Kaitlin and we got seats on the floor which was great. We made it up to be about 20 feet from the stage. We were crowded and tired by the end of the show, but made it through. The most annoying part was the guy and girl behind us making out most of the show. Not that I care what they were doing, but her had kept bumping in to my shoulder, and I would feel him breathe a long exhale down my neck. I was intentionally rude and would step back into them or "accidently" elbow their heads.

Anyways...Ra Ra Riot was first. I had listened to them before, but not a lot. They were very talented. The lead singer is not much of a performer, but it's indie-rock, you're allowed to look nervous. Other than a typical rock lineup of Guitar, Bass, Vocals, and Drums, they had a female violinist, who played with what looked to be a bass bow, and a female Electric-upright bass player who was amazing, AND extremely good looking. Great show overall, but when you only have 20 bucks to last a week, not a "must buy" album for me.

Up next was the Cold War Kids. I own both of their albums. I really liked their first album, particularly 3 or 4 tracks from it. I could take or leave their newer album. To be completely honest, I was very let down by their performance. I was bored. They made a good recorD (emphasis on the singularity) but their live performance was not interesting and they didn't strike me as extremely talented musicians. I don't think I'm the only one who felt this way since the audience was talking most of the time anyway, however, my friend Michael Cooper said the opposite, and said Cold War Kids were his favorite act of the three. I guess it's just a difference of taste.

Oh yes, Death Cab. I really enjoyed the show. It was my second time to see them live. The first time being last summer in Grand Prairie, Texas. No, I am not as cool as everyone who saw them before Transatlantacism came out, when they were cool and "indie". They started the show off with "Bixby Canyon Bridge" which is the first track off of their newest record Narrow Stairs. This is really the only track off of the latest record that I REALLY liked. They played a few tracks off of the new record, hits such as: "Marching Bands of Manhattan", "Soul Meets Body", and "I Will Follow You Into The Dark" which were the radio songs from Plans, as well as "New Year", "Title and Registration", "Sound of Settling" and one or two more from Transatlantacism. I was very happy to hear, from Photo Album, "We Laugh Indoors" and "Movie Script Ending" and I almost wet my pants when they played "Title Track", and "Company Calls" from my favorite album, We Have The Facts and We're Voting Yes. They played a couple songs from their newest EP, which I am afraid to hear in entirety, because I do NOT like what I've heard from it so far. However, ending with the glorious "Transatlantacism" as they did when I saw them the first time, was killer.

Overall, I really enjoyed the show. It was a good time. Also, Ben Gibbard has an Obama sticker on one of his maybe 6 guitars that he played. That was a nice touch.

It changes a lot, but as of now, my rank of DCFC albums goes:

1. We Have The Facts and We're Voting Yes

2. Photo Album

3. Something About Airplanes

4.Transatlantacism

5. Plans

6. You Can Play These Songs With Chords

7. Narrow Stairs

2009-04-14T20:28:00.001-05:00

So...i'm too lazy to blog. So...now i've set up mobile blogging. Maybe this will keep my interest...

Chasing after the wind, looking for meaning.

2009-04-05T17:19:00.002-05:00

Because of something that happened yesterday, I've been re-thinking questions I've had that have always been there.

I find it hard so often to find beauty and meaning in things that are so so bad. Yesterday, someone who is very close to me, lost a very close friend of hers. The girl was shot. It came out today that she was shot by a friend of hers who she used to date. It also came out today that the girl was pregnant with a baby. The father was the gunman.

Why do these things happen? Did God allow this? What purpose did this serve? What part does this play in big picture? Was this supposed to happen? Could we have stopped it? What am I supposed to do to provide comfort. I do not think we can ever have an explanation, and I am tired of hearing people try to find purpose in these things.

Oh blogging

2009-03-26T13:31:00.003-05:00

Honestly, I just don't take the time to write on here. Not that I don't have thoughts or anything, I just don't like blogging a whole lot. Either my thoughts don't work without singing a melody along, or they are far too personal to post, OR, I just don't have enough complete thoughts to write about. I like commenting on your posts, but not necessarily writing my own.

I will still write when I can, but I prefer writing music and poetry, of which I may post some. Most of all, I like tweeting.

www.twitter.com/SpencerSharpe

Read it, follow it, do as you wish.

"Stinkin' Radiohead!"

2009-03-13T18:16:00.002-05:00

Oh my gosh. Miley Cirus (I bet I spelled her last name wrong, but I don't care enough to google it and find out) kills me. I don't blame Thom Yorke at all. Check this out.

An update, I guess

2009-02-19T21:46:00.002-06:00

I've been in a stage recently of putting my life in to perspective. Thinking about what I'm doing and where I'm headed. I graduate from high school in May, which I'm hoping will be the beginning of the next chapter of my life. Less of a chapter, more like another volume of the series of my life.

To be honest, I've been stressed about a lot of things. Things such as: leaving the school I've been at for 14 years, starting college, letting go of relationships that need to be gone, making new friendships, getting a new car, and making enough money to get by this next year.

In the next couple of months, here is what's ahead of me:

-New car- I decided yesterday, after the repairman looked at my car, it's not worth fixing.

-Getting another job to pay a car payment.

-Getting prepared for my 1 and 1/2 month long tour this summer. This also includes: finishing recording, printing more CDs, making T-shirts and stickers, and getting money to eat.

-Graduating and final assignments for school.

There's a lot more things I'm forgetting, but I'm just praying for guidance.

Wet

2009-02-11T12:33:00.002-06:00

Last night...was interesting.

Tuesday nights this semester at 6 p.m., I take a Music Appreciation class at Tulsa Community College. Last night, we got out at 730. Right in the middle of the ridiculous storm. A walk downstairs to the door and look outside. The concept of walking to my car is just a joke. So, one of the other guys in the class and I spend about 15 minutes trying to find a way to get from building to building because we're both parked on the other side of the parking lot, maybe a football field length.

No luck. We just run.

So, I run, wearing my thin slip on shoes, which are really not much thicker than socks, if at all thicker. At some points, the water is several inches deep. Finally, I make it to my car, completely soaked.

I pull out of the school, was planning on going to go to Shades like usual, but decided to head home because of the storm. At 81st and Mingo, I'm in the turn lane to go south on Mingo, my windshield wiper breaks. Yikes. So I turn and manage to pull into McDonalds. As I'm pulling in and pull into a spot, my car loses all power.

I call my parents. No response. I call many more times. No response.

Finally, I get a call back, and my Dad reminds me that I should have replaced that windshield wiper, even though he fixed it once, because it wasn't strong enough. I told him that I couldn't walk to an auto parts store (very sarcastically). They were at Admiral and Yale, I believe, and could not come help.

I thought, "I can fix it".

I get out of my car as the rain is just pouring (pouring is an understatement) down. I try for about a half hour to fix my wiper, my cardigan not keeping me warm, but acting as a sponge.

No luck.

Plan B. I search through my car for duct tape or something so I could repair the wiper. None.

Plan C. I grab a running shoe out of my back seat and take the lace off. I use the lace to tie the wiper together. I fail on the first attempt but come out successful on the second.

Now I've been in the rain for about 30-45 minutes, but have become very accustomed to it.

The power problem happens to my car quite often, so I know what to do, and open the hood and jiggle the battery cable and get power again. I start the car and turn on the now functioning, but shoe-laced, wiper, but I'm still afraid to break it so I keep the wiper on the lowest setting.

I'm almost home, but I thought I deserved a drink from QT so I pull into the one at 81st and Memorial and walk in, literally dripping water on the floor, with my hair looking like I had just come out of the shower. The clerk stares at me, because I'm obviously soaking wet and the only one in the store.

I walk up to the counter, put my drink down, pull out 3 soggy dollars and toss them his way. He then simply says:

"You been like...running around in the rain or something?"

If My Heart Left The Trees...

2009-02-07T16:09:00.002-06:00

This is a song I wrote, I originally wrote it as a poem and changed the format to be a song. These are the words in song lyric form.

I wrote it when I was having conflicting thoughts regarding my future and where I want to live and where I want to go with my life.

"If My Heart Left The Trees"

by Spencer Sharpe

Oh there's music in my soul.

I want to rock, and I want to roll.

Oh there's music in my soul

like the black hills it flows.

My love is deep and my love is pure

but I step on things I can't endure.

I try to hide and I try to seek,

but my heart hangs up in the trees,

up above for all to see

for all to see...

But if you're blind, I will say

my breathe gives it all away.

Sometimes I find it hard to stay

because things don't always go my way.

But I know that if I leave,

I will cough and I will heave

all the things I'd long to see

that are so very dear to me.

All the people, all the trees,

all the children, all the leaves,

all these things I'd long to see,

if my heart left the trees.

I want to survive 2012...or at least this week.

2009-02-02T12:29:00.003-06:00

Michael told me to write something. I thought about it and had nothing to say, but then I saw something about "Survive 2012". I heard something about this the other day and didn't think it was anything, but I saw something about it on the MySpace home page. Apparently, there's an old Mayan prophesy that the world will end on December 21st, 2012.

Maybe the Charismatic Christians weren't/aren't so crazy after all with all this stuff about how we are the last generation that will live.

Wait....no they're still crazy. Anyway, here's the link.

On the other hand, this last week was probably the weirdest week of my life. This is no exaggeration. I won't go into detail, because a lot of it is much too personal to just put out online, but Sunday to Sunday last week to yesterday was ridiculous, and just....weird. All sorts of things happened.

Seriously. I wrote everything down in detail yesterday so I'll remember it for the rest of my life.

I have a dream.

2009-01-19T22:20:00.004-06:00

This year, more than ever, I have taken a lot of time today to reflect on what a great man Martin Luther King was. We've always taken this day off of school, but I guess I just threw it in to the pile of holidays that I could care less about (like the ones having to do with war). But this year, I've taken a different approach. I don't know if it's because these days I'm more of a civil rights activist than in years past, or because Obama will be inaugurated tomorrow, or if it's a total coincidence.

Anyway, today I was at Whole Foods, eating pizza. I was sitting a table close to the massage booth, which is up and running most days. The lady running the booth was an African American. While I was eating, a white gentleman walked by me and the booth and just looked at the woman and smiled and said plainly, "bless you" and the woman replied with a smile and a "thank you, very much." He didn't make a show out of it, and I was the only one who heard other than the two of them.

But, this really touched me.

As a middle-classed caucasian, Christian, I am anything but a minority. However, this year I am finally starting to grasp what a great thing MLK did for everyone. Not just for blacks, but for all minorities, and I think celebrating his 80th birthday with the inaugration of a black president during the same week, is the complete fulfillment of Martin Luther King Jr.'s dream.

Favorite 10 Albums of 2008

2009-01-10T17:07:00.002-06:00

1. The Envy Corps- Dwell

I love this album from the first second I heard it, amazing music, lyrics and dynamics. Could not be better.

2. Coldplay- Viva La Vida

My second favorite Coldplay, behind Parachutes. This album is really great and is different than all of their other albums. Very intelligent and original.

3. Death Cab For Cutie- Narrow Stairs

Not my favorite Death Cab. Like Coldplay, this album is very different, but I do like it. They have really taken a different route musically.

4. Television Dreams- Chris McLeod

Even if I didn't know him, I would still like this album. Very creative and incredible song-writing.

5. The Sucker Punch Show- Lovedrug

Again, different than their other stuff. This album was actually a lot more rock than the others. The lyrics were a lot about how he lost his faith.

6. Ryan Adams & The Cardinals- Cardinology

A great album. I think I like it almost as much as Cold Roses, which is his other album with The Cardinals.

7. Jenny Lewis- Acid Tongue

This is Jenny Lewis, of Rilo Kiley. Good album.

8. Fleet Foxes- Fleet Foxes

Not a lot to say, but I dig.

9. Conor Oberst- Conor Oberst

First solo album. Bright Eyes is his main project.

10. Cold War Kids- Loyalty To Loyalty

I like their first album better, but this one is alright.

Honorable Mention: Sigur Ros- Sigur Ros

I don't own this album, but when I heard it, I really liked it.

So this is the new year...

2009-01-04T15:55:00.002-06:00

...and I have no resolution.

This is going to be a very interesting year for me. As a student, I usually view "years" based on the school season, but now I'm taking time to view things in the eyes of the rest of the world.

This year, I graduate high-school, start college, move out, change schools for the first time, and turn 19. This is one of the most significant years in someone's life. (But I've only lived for 18 years so I really don't anything about the significance of years).

Anyway, this year is going to be big, but for the first time in a while, I didn't really come up with any new resolutions.

I guess I could start working out, but I don't really want to.

I could spend less money on coffee, but I really like coffee.

I could save to buy a new car. But for now, my car works.

I have no resolution, but I'm not sure if I think that's so bad.

Well...Merry Christmas

2008-12-21T16:45:00.002-06:00

I don't really have much to say but, Merry Christmas. This is a great, but stressful time of the year and I guess I'm ready for it to be over. I guess I'll just share what I've been up to.

Currently Reading (In order of how much I've actually been "reading" them:

-Simple Spirituality by Christopher L. Heuretz

-Speaker For The Dead by Orson Scott Card

-Jesus For President by Shane Claiborne

-Soul Graffiti by Mark Scandrette

-Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury

Listening To:

Chris McLeod, Television Dreams

Lovedrug, The Sucker Punch Show

Drinking:

Rwandan and Guatemalan brews from Shades of Brown

There is my life in about 10 lines.

Rather than study....

2008-12-10T13:00:00.002-06:00

Rather than study for a Geography test, I will write some things I have been thinking about lately.

The most common question for the lack of belief of God, and one of the largest doubts of Christians is wondering why evil exists, and why bad things happen.

I'm not here to give an answer. We will never have a good answer, I believe.

However, my brother and I were discussing this and he shared something that he has conjured after hearing this question so much. I have the tendency to buy even the James Dobson argument that says that all evil will be destroyed someday. But, that's just not enough, and I don't buy the argument put forth by many Christians that we can just fix everything, because that's just stupid.

My brother led me to the second chapter of Mark where Jesus heals a paralytic. What does Jesus do first?

1. Forgive the man's sins.

And second?

2. Tells him to get up and walk.

Has Jesus forgiven our sins? Yes

Are we all healed? No

We are at an in between time in our world. What did Jesus do between forgiving the sins of the man and healing him? He was present.

Yes our sins are forgiven and we will be healed someday, but we are still suffering. What can we do now? Be present.

We cannot go around and tell everyone that their sins are forgiven and that's enough, nor can we heal everyone. We can be present and show Christ's presence to others through our selves and our own lives.

We will never be able figure out the cause of suffering, but I think this is how we are to deal with it.

Selah

2008-12-04T23:55:00.003-06:00

Here I am, almost midnight, eating a peanut butter & jelly sandwich and drinking a glass of milk. I just finished one of the most busy days of my life, including school, two rehearsals and a show.

And I can't leave out the fact that I have to be at school tomorrow at 730, have a music rehearsal, then performance, then perform a play that I am in, have a play practice, go to work, go to my friends housewarming party and play a show later that night.

However, Saturday, I have to get up early, run sound for a play rehearsal, spend the afternoon setting up for church, and then perform the final and main performance of the play.

But at least Sunday I get to arrive at my parents church at 8, practice, and play. Then, we have a family Christmas picture and I get to spend the rest of the day making a project. And wake up Monday, and start all over.

The best part is, I am completely relaxed. I am one who is known to stress about things, but today (it's almost tomorrow), I am taking time to breathe, at least enough time to read a blog. I am learning to be still when I need it the most.

Goodnight.

Spencer's Top 5's

2008-12-01T12:33:00.003-06:00

These are my top 5 FAVORITE of these different things. Not the BEST.

Movies: (This was hard because of difference of genres)

1. Garden State (Zach Braff, 2004)

2. Little Miss Sunshine (Jonathan Dayton, 2006)

3. Once (John Carney, 2006)

4. Dead Poets Society (Peter Weir, 1989)

5. Dumb and Dumber (Peter Ferrelly, 1994)

(I have yet to see Eternal Sunshine of The Spotless Mind, which I hear will change this list.)

Books (Fiction):

1. Ender's Game (Orson Scott Card, 1985)

2. My Name Is Asher Lev (Chaim Potok, 1972)

3. Romeo and Juliet (William Shakespeare)

4. Slaughterhouse 5 (Kurt Vonnegut, 1969)

5. The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe (C.S. Lewis, 1950)

Books (Non-Fiction):

1. Blue Like Jazz (Donald Miller, 2003)

2. Traveling Mercies (Anne Lamont, 2000)

3. Velvet Elvis (Rob Bell, 2005)

4. Through Painted Deserts (Donald Miller, 2005)

5. Searching For God Knows What? (Donald Miller, 2004)

Albums:

1. The Photo Album (Death Cab for Cutie, 2001)

2. Parachutes (Coldplay, 2000)

3. In Rainbows (Radiohead, 2007)

4. Give Up (Postal Service, 2003)

5. Michigan (Sufjan Stevens, 2003)

TV Shows:

1. Lost

2. Arrested Development

3. The Office

4. Seinfeld

5. Flight of The Concords

The Advent Conspiracy

2008-11-24T12:18:00.002-06:00

With only 1/45th of how much America spends on Christmas each year, we could give everyone in the world clean water. Lack of water kills more people than ANYTHING. Let's remember what Christmas is about this year.

Check this out.

Obama and Abraham Lincoln

2008-11-20T16:21:00.001-06:00

Check this out:

2008-11-13T15:22:00.002-06:00

I was talking with some friends this morning and we were discussing politics as always. We talked about Obama being the president elect, how conservatives are reacting, the possible next Republican candidate, and how crazy Sarah Palin is.

We were talking about faith and how they relate to politics, and one thing really struck me. We need to redefine the gospel. I know that sounds scary, but Christianity is looking scary. The fact that there are so many churches but still so many orphans and homeless.

Especially homeless.

We get so caught up in our capitalistic society so we say "I'm not helping that bum, he is lazy and needs to get a job." First of all, that's probably not even true. We don't know his story until we ask him. When in scripture does it ever say "Sell your possessions and give the money to the poor, BUT if the poor don't look like they're getting a job, you don't have to give them anything." Correct me if I am wrong, but I don't think we are ever to love or give only conditionally.

Or when does it say "Jesus loves everyone! (except gays, terrorists, Hillary Clinton, illegal immigrants, and the liberal media)"?

I just wonder, sometimes. What would our world look like if we read the gospel like Jesus intended us to?

Vote for Change

2008-11-04T15:39:00.003-06:00

Video Blog

2008-10-30T16:21:00.003-05:00

So I lied about making this blog a video blog. I'm keeping them separate. This is my new video blog, and I'm keeping this one too.

"Why does the devil have all the good music?"

2008-10-27T11:53:00.004-05:00

I was inspired to write this based on a relevant issue for Christians everywhere. Yesterday, I posted a video on my Facebook, which was attended to be comical like the video in my last post. The video is different shots of my random, basic life, but the music is "Lose Yourself" by Eminem; a song that everyone has heard and has a pretty sweet beat, so it is completely irrelevant to the video.

The song says a few words that could be seen as inappropriate to some, but then the big "Mother F***ing" twice. Even though no one knows where that word ever came from, I try to avoid using it for the sake of negative connotations in different peoples minds, but it is by no means foreign to me.

I didn't think a thing about it.

I got some complaints. Several people mentioned why I didn't use a "Christian" rap song. Well, that would somewhat defeat the entire purpose of the video.

This is so frustrating to me. I don't even like 90%....ok....98% of "Christian" music. "What makes it Christian?" is the question that I struggle with. Is it because it says God in the song? Is it because it's made by Christians? Is it because it's made for Christians to listen to? There are plenty of Christians whose music isn't in the mainstream Christian market.

Whatever the definition is, the concept of creating art is lost in entirety. It's just making something that sounds like something else (but says "God"). It's not true art. All beauty is lost.

Is all music BUT "Christian" music bad? Therefore are all things that are secular are have no artistic value? Only "Christian" movies, plays, paintings, poems are acceptable?

There are a few artists I think that actually create music for it's artistic value and get pushed in the Christian market. (Robbie Seay Band, Edison Glass, David Crowder Band, and more).

There is so much truth in music that so many Christians call "secular", or you can find truth in the ABSENCE of it. And besides, why do we have to devalue everything that we think has nothing to do with God?

I hear at school all the time "Well Reliant K says there a Christian band, but they sing about girls and stuff, so there's really nothing Christian about it." What's wrong with singing about human struggles? We are humans aren't we?

As a songwriter, this is a really sensitive subject to me.

Finally, why do Christians always feel that we need to separate ourselves? Yeah, we are not called to be OF the world, but we are called to be IN the world. Why do we have Christian movies, music, coffee shops, bookstores, and restaurants? People separate themselves and create this sub-culture that I think is really unhealthy.

Music is not marketing. It's art. It's true. It's beautiful. Of anyone, the church should be the last people to try and copy something that's true.

Video Series

2008-10-21T20:01:00.003-05:00

I'm going to make this blog take somewhat of a shift. I may be heading more in the direction of video blogs. I make a lot of them, so I'll at least be posting a lot of them.

Here's a "cover" of the Shiny Toy Guns.

Tralfamadorians

2008-10-19T21:18:00.002-05:00

This is a song I wrote recently, called Tralfamadorians. It is very inspired by Slaughterhouse 5 by Kurt Vonnegut.

Here it goes....

Calendar pages turn, meaning nothing more than words

Numbers don't have significance, time is what you make it

Like the rocky mountains from up above selecting where you want to go

All time is all time, it does not change, it does not lend itself to warnings or explanations

It simply is, take it moment by moment by moment

My life's not being recorded

It's not on your T.V.

You can't use that fast-forward button on me

My life's not being recorded

It's not on your T.V.

You can't use that fast-forward button on me

I'll be 18 in the morning, but I'm still searching for truth

I'm standing on a pedestal fear, looking through the lenses of my dreams

I've got life in my hands but the hand of death is reaching in my pocket

I'll be 18 in the morning, but I'm still searching for truth

I'm standing on a pedestal of fear, looking through the lenses of my dreams

I've got life in my hands but the hand of death is reaching in my pocket

I'll be 18 in the morning, but I'm still searching for truth

I'll be 18 in the morning, but I'm still so far from truth

New Directions

2008-10-14T19:38:00.002-05:00

Hello. It's been a long long while. Too long, if you ask me.

I'm really trying to get back into this blogging thing because I feel that for the first time, I actually might have something worth saying.

I'm going to keep this post short, but one question I have been asking myself recently is:

Did Jesus intend on creating a religion?

I've been reading Mark Scandrette's book "Soul Graffiti" ( I know, English nerds, a book title is supposed to be underlined, but I can't figure out how to underline on this website) and it has been really inspiring.

I've also been listening to Page France a lot. I recommend them for everyone.

Goodbye for now.

Home from Chicago...all things grow

2007-10-22T17:18:00.001-05:00

Yes, I'm home from the glorious, windy city (No joke. It's extremely windy. The wind can literally change the course of your walking). My family and I left Wednesday afternoon for Kansas City to take a train Thursday morning to Chicago. The train was a great experience and longer, but more pleasant than riding in a car or plane.

While in the city, we had a blast. Lake Michigan is so clear and so pretty, and the city is just beautiful. Honestly, I think I might like it a little bit better than New York. That's not a final statement, but it might be true.

In Chicago, we didn't do anything outstandingly cool other than ride a train and go to H&M (which might have been my favorite part). My second favorite part may have been every time anyone ended a sentence with "Chicago," my brother tagged on "all things grow." (Which is a line in Sufjan Stevens' song "Chicago").

I'm not sure if I remember anything else other than that I went to some sweet stores and get blown away. It was awesome....

A long chilly day

2007-10-15T15:51:00.001-05:00

Here I am, at Shades of Brown, listening to Radiohead "In Rainbows," drinking a hot mocha after a ridiculously long day. I was planning on going through the ups and downs of today, but instead I'll do the best I can and hope, being underage, that indie music and caffeine will take my sorrows away...

Oh Yoshemi

2007-09-24T15:41:00.000-05:00

So...like the typical afternoon in Spencerworld, I'm at Shades of Brown doing the homework thing. There's a girl who works here most afternoons who always puts on the same, if not very similar, playlists on the computer. Most playlists have a small variety, with always at least one Coldplay song, and one particular Flaming Lips song, "Yoshemi battles..(the something)." I don't remember. It's a good song, but everyday?

Autumn Whispers In Your Ear

2007-08-22T19:59:00.000-05:00

This is a poem/song that I wrote a few weeks back about this fall and dreams I was having about what's to come this fall and this next year.

Autumn whispers in your ear to tell you about the dreams you've had
Waiting for direction, waiting for the sun to set,
you don't need to run, it won't do much, you won't get wet.
I don't see anything but green.

I want you in my dreams.
I want you to go with me.
I want you to hem the seems.
I need you to make them reality.
Reality...

Autumn whispers in your ear to tell you about your plans next year.
It's a marvelous mystery how we all think we can see the future.
It's a similar mystery how we all think we can fix each other.
I don't see anything but green.

I want you in my dreams.
I want you to go with me.
I want you to hem the seems.
I need you to make them reality.
Reality...
Reality...

Autumn is not green.

China

2007-07-12T23:50:00.000-05:00

I had an amazing time and did some amazing things, so here's a few of them . These will be really basic so if you want a deeper explination, you'll have to ask me personally.

Some incredible things I got to do:
-Make new Chinese friends and get closer to my other friends.
-Go to China and Japan (twice, once for 2 hours and once for 5) on the same trip
-Go to the great wall
-Camp on the great wall
-Brush my teeth on the great wall
-Wake up and see the sunrise on the great wall.
-Throw up off the great wall.
-Go to Bejing
-Learn how to play "Murder In The Dark"
-Eat Bejing duck and hot pot.
-Go to Tannomen Square and the Forbidden City
-I wore my "I'm a legend in Japan" shirt in Japan.

Some things I learned:
-Chinese count there money differently.
-Seeing two guys or girls holding hands is just a friendship thing in China.
-Never tell any smart, determined, Chinese high school students that you know anything about Harvard University.
-Never hire a Chinese bus driver over the age of 40.
-If so, they will follow you EVERYWHERE, eat with you, and tell you that you are eating wrong.
-Never tell any Chinese business men that you like business or know anything about it unless you are God or Josh Young.
-Yes, squatty pottys are the only option.
-We joke about it, but the Chinese really are good at ping-pong.
-Never eat an "American Breakfast" on a Japanese Airlines.
-Never eat anything on an American Airlines.
-In a Chinese market, never even pretend to be interested in anything.
-There are not a billion people in China. There are a billion people in every small village in China.
-Never try to explain the NBDL to a beginning English student.
-Pig lungs are actually very tasty.
-Being in a small town there, Starbucks sounds amazing by the end of the week.
-Never try to order with organic milk at Starbucks in China.
-Never try to order at Starbucks in China.

I'm sure I'm forgetting a lot but this is all I can remeber right now.

7th Graders in Post-Modern Culture

2006-09-06T21:53:00.000-05:00

So, I'm basing this post off of an expierience again. This past week, my little sister, Hayley, got a cell phone. This was bothering me for a little while because when I was in 7th grade, I was on four praise and worship teams, and involved in more sports and activities in general than she was at this age, but I still could not have one and I have noticed several things that they have softened on. My parents excuse was that times are changing and culture is changing and I said "but that doesn't ma...."then I caught myself. I was always the one who told my bible teachers and youth leaders that culture was changing and alot of styles and things are big now that were never before. So I came to the conclusion that I don't care at all. Times are changing and have been for a while. Change is something that I have a tough time dealing with alot. I hope you got something out of this...but probably not.

Pluto, Mars, and My Social Justice Car

2006-08-29T19:17:00.001-05:00

I'm sorry I haven't been blogging lately. Blogging has been the pits....Like arm pits. Blogging has been arm pits. Nobody else updates...I don't update. It's simple.

Anyway. School has started and I'm tired all ready. My first thought though was about Pluto. (Not the dog, the planet but I liked the picture of the dog better) What's this stuff about it "officially not being a planet anymore" I have been taught since kindergarten that it was and now it's not? You can't just say it's not because than you could say "the US is not a country anymore." Oh well. They probably had good reason though...or maybe not.

The "Mars" in the title wasn't actually about the planet it was about my teacher Mrs. Mars. (But again I liked the picture of the planet better) So, if you don't know this, I spent most of my summer reading The Count of Monte Cristo. For school, we had to read the book and write a paper for English class. I read the book and wrote what I thought was a good paper. I showed up with the paper on the first day of school in English II class room 204 with my paper in hand. I asked when we would turn it in and she told me Monday. I was satisfied. Monday I show up with my paper and my homework from Friday, ready to turn in. We go to hand it all in and she said "Don't turn in your homework, we're going to go over it." I recognized this but still went to hand my paper in but she said "You're not supposed to be handing anything in to me." So I thought "I guess we'll turn it in later." I almost forgot about it when two days later someone in the class asked "When do you want our Summer Reading papers?" She replied "Uhh...Last Monday!" Everyone was confused. Then she said "I will accept them for half credit." I was crazy mad. I worked hard on the thing. I had to have my mom talk to her because she's a scary lady. But it all got worked out and I got full credit. My Mom's amazing.

On the other side of life...I got a 4runner a few months ago. I can't drive it yet because I'm not old enough so it sits. For a while, my brother's car was broken so he borrowed my Dad's car and my Dad drove mine. Soon after....My sister's car got totaled and she has been borrowing it for several weeks until she got a new one the other day. During that time both she and Jordan (her very close really good friend...haha) drove it. Less than 24 hours later my friend Chris (Jordan's brother...haha inside joke) needed a car to use while his was being fixed so he has been driving it for a few days. Who's next...

Lastly, I'm opening up for Too Few Forgotten at the Refuge September 8th at 9. Then, I'm playing bass for my friend Ryan who's also playing. If any of you could come that would be awesome.

Well, Life's been good and I hope I get to drive my car a little bit at least in the next couple years.

The Overwhelming Excitement of a Beta Fish

2006-08-16T09:27:00.000-05:00

So, the past few days I have just been wanting a big aquarium in my room. So yesterday I went to PETCO and looked around at all the different possibilities. The main tank I was looking at was a 10 gallon tank about 20 inches wide and a foot tall. It came with everything, lights, pump, filter, ect. It was sixty bucks but I was going to do it. I also looked at a foot wide pirate ship to put on the inside which was 20. I looked at all the possible fish I could get and the main one I wanted was a bala shark which are 3 inches long as babies but could grow to be over a foot long. I was thinking "that would be so sweet if I had a shark." I wanted to put betta fish, goldfish, guppies and all kinds of things in the tank...but it came up to over a hundred bucks and my mom was like "how do you know you'll like it?" and I said "Trust me. I will love it." But I decided that was too much and the guy told me with a ten gallon tank you can't hold a bala shark at it's full grown size, let alone other fish.

So I looked around and saw another tank. Same size just no lights or cleaning stuff. I thought at first "I could get JUST a bala shark" but I realized that if I have to clean it myself I don't want to take a foot long shark out of a tank weekly. So I said how about just goldfish, guppies, and some beta. We asked the guy that but he said betas can't be with other fish. So I said, "okay just like 5 betas then." But he said betas must be alone. So in the end I got one beta fish (his name is Owen), food and cleaning supplies, a plant, a "No Fishing" sign, and a little statue of liberty.

I went home, set up his bowl, put him in and was entertained for about a minute and then went down stairs. So, what I was getting to was that things can seem a lot more exciting before they happen. Possibly even worth a hundred bucks. But in the end, it's just a beta fish.

In Sickness and In Health...and then a weird dream

2006-08-07T11:31:00.000-05:00

Pretty catchy title huh? But this first half is actually just about sickness. I've got a virus of some kind. I think I got it from my sister who just hugs me too much. I rarely get sick. Yesterday I threw up for the first time since November of 99'. I was able to eat some food today and let it settle which is good but I still am congested and don't feel well.

Okay, Now I want to go a totally different direction from the beginning of the post and tell you about a dream I had last Saturday (Not two days ago the one before). That night a lot of the people from Saturday Night went out to celebrate Zach's birthday and a lot of them were in my dream. (If you don't go to SN you won't understand who any of these people are)

So most of the dream was about me living with Josiah and Chris. I remember it was boring living with them because they just played Scrabble all day and I had to wake them up every morning to take me to school. But I remember going with them to Saturday Night and afterwards all the people went out to a bar to celebrate my birthday. So we were all having fun sitting around a table except for everyone was doing wired things...Like Liz was sitting at the table and kept turning into Kate....And then back into herself. It was strange. Then we all started ordering drinks and because of my youngness I was just like "I'll just have a coke." And then Josiah was said, "Dude get a beer." I was trying to explain to him that I wasn't old enough, but he was like "I'll buy you a beer." So they gave me a beer and I took a drink, and it tasted like apple juice! So I had like four beers and it was fun. But then at the end of the dream Chris was yelling at me for some reason I don't know. But it was great.

I think that all came from that day I was joking with Chris about how it would be funny if I lived with them. And that night everyone went out for Zach's birthday. But I really don't know where the apple juice beer came in other than I drink a lot of apple juice.